Funny Relatable Quotes Funny Animal Quotes
Untamed Animals is a website I started that is mostly about wild animals but it wasn't until I started researching for this post that I realized how many remarkable thinkers and all-round smart people had thought about animals in such profound ways.
I'm sure you'll enjoy these sincere, funny and above else thought-provoking quotes about animals.
Animal Quotes
"An animal's eyes have the power to speak a great language."
―Martin Buber
"Animals are reliable, many full of love, true in their affections, predictable in their actions, grateful and loyal. Difficult standards for people to live up to."
―Alfred A. Montapert
"Animals are such agreeable friends―they ask no questions, they pass no criticisms."
―George Eliot
"If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and man."
―Mark Twain
"People who really appreciated animals always asked their names."
Animal Quotes
―Lilian Jackson Braun
"If you have men who will exclude any of God's creatures from the shelter of compassion and pity, you will have men who will deal likewise with their fellow men."
―Francis Of Assisi
"The creatures outside looked from pig to man, and from man to pig, and from pig to man again; but already it was impossible to say which was which."
―George Orwell
"If a dog will not come to you after having looked you in the face, you should go home and examine your conscience."
―Woodrow Wilson
"To see ten thousand animals untamed and not branded with the symbols of human commerce is like scaling an unconquered mountain for the first time, or like finding a forest without roads or footpaths, or the blemish of an axe. You know then what you had always been told — that the world once lived and grew without adding machines and newsprint and brick-walled streets and the tyranny of clocks."
―Beryl Markham
"Some people talk to animals. Not many listen though. That's the problem."
Animal Quotes
―A. A. Milne
"Petting, scratching, and cuddling a dog could be as soothing to the mind and heart as deep meditation and almost as good for the soul as prayer."
―Dean Koontz
"People speak sometimes about the "bestial" cruelty of man, but that is terribly unjust and offensive to beasts, no animal could ever be so cruel as a man, so artfully, so artistically cruel."
―Fyodor Dostoyevsky
"I am fond of pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals."
―Winston S. Churchill
"Such short little lives our pets have to spend with us, and they spend most of it waiting for us to come home each day.
It is amazing how much love and laughter they bring into our lives and even how much closer we become with each other because of them."
―John Grogan
"Until one has loved an animal, a part of one's soul remains unawakened."
Animal Quotes
―Anatole France
"The bee is domesticated but not tamed."
―William Longgood
"Answer me, you who believe that animals are only machines. Has nature arranged for this animal to have all the machinery of feelings only in order for it not to have any at all?"
―Voltaire
"Animals don't hate, and we're supposed to be better than them."
―Elvis Presley
"You think those dogs will not be in heaven! I tell you they will be there long before any of us."
―Robert Louis Stevenson
"Our perfect companions never have fewer than four feet."
―Colette
"If having a soul means being able to feel love and loyalty and gratitude, then animals are better off than a lot of humans."
―James Herriot
"I think I could turn and live with animals, they are so placid and self-contained, I stand and look at them long and long. They do not sweat and whine about their condition, They do not lie awake in the dark and weep for their sins, They do not make me sick discussing their duty to God, Not one is dissatisfied, not one is demented with the mania of owning things, Not one kneels to another, nor to his kind that lived thousands of years ago, Not one is respectable or unhappy over the whole earth."
―Walt Whitman
"Animals don't lie. Animals don't criticize. If animals have moody days, they handle them better than humans do."
―Betty White
"Hair on a man's chest is thought to denote strength. The gorilla is the most powerful of bipeds and has hair on every place on his body except for his chest."
―Anton LaVey
"Animals, like us, are living souls. They are not things. They are not objects. Neither are they human. Yet they mourn. They love. They dance. They suffer. They know the peaks and chasms of being."
Animal Quotes
―Gary Kowalski
"Animals don't know as much about jealousy as people, but they're not ignorant of it, either."
―Stephen King
"Everybody is born so that they can learn to live a good life-like loving everybody and being nice, right? Well animals already know how to do that, so they don't have to live so long"
―Robin Downing
"Humanity's true moral test, its fundamental test…consists of its attitude towards those who are at its mercy: animals."
―Milan Kundera
"Kinship with all creatures of the earth, sky, and water was a real and active principle. In the animal and bird world there existed a brotherly feeling that kept us safe among them… The animals had rights – the right of man's protection, the right to live, the right to multiply, the right to freedom, and the right to man's indebtedness. This concept of life and its relations filled us with the joy and mystery of living; it gave us reverence for all life; it made a place for all things in the scheme of existence with equal importance to all."
―Chief Luther Standing Bear
"Horses make a landscape look beautiful."
Animal Quotes
―Alice Walker
"If ever you feel like an animal among men, be a lion."
―Criss Jami
"The smaller the creature, the bolder its spirit."
―Suzy Kassem
"Love the animals: God has given them the rudiments of thought and joy untroubled."
―Fyodor Dostoyevsky
"One disadvantage of being a hog is that at any moment some blundering fool may try to make a silk purse out of your wife's ear."
―J.B. Morton
"Wild animals are less wild and more human than many humans of this world"
Animal Quotes
―Munia Khan
"You don't have to choose between being scientific and being compassionate."
―Robert M. Sapolsky
"I could end this with a moral,
as if this were a fable about animals,
though no fables are really about animals."
―Margaret Atwood
"Animals are born who they are, accept it, and that is that. They live with greater peace than people do."
―Gregory Maguire
Funny Animal Quotes
"Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read."
―Groucho Marx
"Happiness is a warm puppy."
―Charles M. Schulz
"I always hated those classic kid movies like Old Yeller or The Yearling where the beloved pet dies. What would be so wrong with having those damn kids learn their lessons about mortality from watching Grandpa kick? Then at least the dog would be around to comfort them."
―Merrill Markoe
"I hated cats. I was a dog lover," Des says with a shrug. "What's the point of a cat? They're not affectionate. But that's because it's not my cat. I mean, your wife wouldn't jump on my lap. That's because she's your wife, not mine. Until you have your own cat, you really don't understand."
―Rescue Ink
"Dogs never bite me. Just humans."
Animal Quotes
―Marilyn Monroe
"It wouldn't happen… There hasn't been one publication by a monkey"
―Karl Pilkington
"A few alligators are naturally of the vicious type and inclined to resent it when you prod them with a stick. You can find out which ones these are by prodding them."
―Will Cuppy
"The problem with cats is that they get the same exact look whether they see a moth or an ax-murderer."
―Paula Poundstone
"Meow" means "woof" in cat."
―George Carlin
"If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much."
Animal Quotes
―Mark Twain
"You know, sometimes the world seems like a pretty mean place. That's why animals are so soft and huggy."
―Bill Watterson
"Animals never worry about Heaven or Hell. neither do I. maybe that's why we get along"
―Charles Bukowski
"I have studied many philosophers and many cats. The wisdom of cats is infinitely superior."
―Hippolyte A. Taine
"If frogs had side pockets, they'd carry hand guns."
―Dan Rather
"Heaven goes by favor. If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in."
Animal Quotes
―Mark Twain
"Walter had never liked cats. They'd seemed to him the sociopaths of the pet world, a species domesticated as an evil necessary for the control of rodents and subsequently fetishized the way unhappy countries fetishize their militaries, saluting the uniforms of killers as cat owners stroke their animals' lovely fur and forgive their claws and fangs. He'd never seen anything in a cat's face but simpering incuriosity and self-interest; you only had to tease one with a mouse-toy to see where it's true heart lay…cats were all about using people"
―Jonathan Franzen
"Whoever said you can't buy happiness forgot little puppies."
―Gene Hill
"If it looks like a
―Timmothy Radman
"A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down."
―Robert Benchley
Vegan and Animal Protection Quotes
"Animals are my friends…and I don't eat my friends."
―George Bernard Shaw
"The greatness of a nation and its moral progress can be judged by the way its animals are treated."
―Mahatma Gandhi
"I ask people why they have deer heads on their walls. They always say because it's such a beautiful animal. There you go. I think my mother is attractive, but I have photographs of her."
―Ellen DeGeneres
"The only good cage is an empty cage."
―Lawrence Anthony
"You can judge a man's true character by the way he treats his fellow animals."
Animal Quotes
―Paul McCartney
"The fate of animals is of far greater importance to me than the fear of appearing ridiculous."
―Emile Zola
"The assumption that animals are without rights and the illusion that our treatment of them has no moral significance is a positively outrageous example of Western crudity and barbarity. Universal compassion is the only guarantee of morality."
―Arthur Schopenhauer
"The animals of the world exist for their own reasons. They were not made for humans any more than black people were made for white, or women created for men."
―Alice Walker
"I have from an early age abjured the use of meat, and the time will come when men such as I will look upon the murder of animals as they now look upon the murder of men."
―Leonardo da Vinci
"Four legs good, two legs bad."
Animal Quotes
―George Orwell
"Most people would say they love animals, but the reality is, if your using animals for
―Melisser Elliot
"A man can live and be healthy without killing animals for
―Leo Tolstoy
"Compassion for animals is intimately associated with goodness of character, and it may be confidently asserted that he who is cruel to animals cannot be a good man."
―Arthur Schopenhauer
"To my mind, the life of a lamb is no less precious than that of a human being."
―Mahatma Gandhi
"If slaughterhouses had glass walls, the whole world would be vegetarian."
Animal Quotes
―Linda McCartney
"Perhaps in the back of our minds we already understand, without all the science I've discussed, that something terribly wrong is happening. Our sustenance now comes from misery. We know that if someone offers to show us a film on how our meat is produced, it will be a horror film. We perhaps know more than we care to admit, keeping it down in the dark places of our memory– disavowed. When we eat factory-farmed meat we live, literally, on tortured flesh. Increasingly, that tortured flesh is becoming our own."
―Jonathan Safran Foer
"May all that have life be delivered from suffering"
―Buddha
"To be a vegetarian is to disagree – to disagree with the course of things today… starvation, cruelty – we must make a statement against these things. Vegetarianism is my statement. And I think it's a strong one."
―Isaac Bashevis Singer
"We must fight against the spirit of unconscious cruelty with which we treat the animals. Animals suffer as much as we do. True humanity does not allow us to impose such sufferings on them. It is our duty to make the whole world recognize it. Until we extend our circle of compassion to all living things, humanity will not find peace."
―Albert Schweitzer
"Veganism is not a "sacrifice." It is a joy."
Animal Quotes
―Gary Francione
"Do you know why most survivors of the Holocaust are vegan? It's because they know what it's like to be treated like an animal."
―Chuck Palahniuk
"Man, do not pride yourself on your superiority to the animals, for they are without sin, while you, with all your greatness, you defile the earth wherever you appear and leave an ignoble trail behind you — and that is true, alas, for almost every one of us!"
―Fyodor Dostoyevsky
"..the most dangerous animal in a zoo is Man."
―Yann Martel
"More often than not, what animals require our protection from is not hurricanes or fires, but abuse at the hands of other people"."
―Julie Klam
"For animals that are overworked, underfed, and cruelly treated; for all wistful creatures in captivity that beat their wings against bars; for any that are hunted or lost or deserted or frightened or hungry; for all that must be put to death…and for those who deal with them we ask a heart of compassion and gentle hands and kindly words."
―Albert Schweitzer
Which animal quote did you find the most interesting?
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Source: https://untamedanimals.com/animal-quotes/